One of the most annoying parts of being head of the Illuminati is all of the fake meetings I have to attend. Think of how annoying real meetings are. Fake meetings are even worse. I’m in Switzerland for the 2011 Bilderberg meeting. Nothing actually goes on during the Bilderberg meeting. It’s just a ruse to fool conspiracy theorists. To make the ruse work, everyone including me has to show up at it. I can’t even enjoy Switzerland. I have to be in pretend meetings all day.
That’s bad enough but it’s actually worse. Because this is a ruse to fool conspiracy theorists they actually show up and yell using bullhorns. Alex Jones is notorious for yelling through a bullhorn at our fake meetings. Having to listen to Alex Jones yell in a bullhorn is what Hell must be like. The Reptile Alien Homeworld will not let me do anything like shape shift into a demon to scare off the conspiracy theorists because that would destroy the purpose of having these fake meetings. Luckily this will only be a few days.
The Illuminati’s real meetings are much more interesting and fun. They take place in areas you can’t get to such as deep space and underground where the worms from hell live.